Fowl Play

It is truly disheartening to those, who walk through farms, or travel through nature, when they see the animal pens, sparsely filled with thin and sickly looking chickens who cannot even hope to feed the reasonable appetite of the average American. These chickens instead of being a good source of meat, are made to sit there and just look hungry.

            Surely it is agreed by every farmer that this plethora of poor chickens needs to be fed more in order to produce more meat for the consumer because these animals cannot fulfill their purpose in life. Also, the manner is which chickens are killed is very time-consuming and makes the poor farmer gaze into the chicken's eyes as they take its life.

Since there are only around 8 billion chickens in the U.S. and 300 million hungry Americans to feed, how can we expect everyone to get a decent amount of their favorite meat? This is not a fair distribution and the poor chicken is not able to feed as many mouths as it could.

My solution, if carried out, will make sure each American never has to feel peckish again, that the chickens will be extremely healthy, and that the process we use to kill chickens will be improved greatly.

I will now “humbly” propose my solution to this grave dilemma that faces our country today.

My friends in labs have developed this magical drug that they have assured me will make a normal chicken two times as big and that they will be a much healthier size. 

Doesn't he look so happy?

We do not yet know what else this drug will do to them, but that is no matter; as long as they grow it will be beneficial for everyone. Furthermore, because of their large size they will not be able to escape the farm because they will not be able to move which will make sure that they do not face danger in the wild. Also, in order to speed up the process with which they are killed, we will drop them in a machine with hooks that will simply grab them and give them one simple cut to end their life. This is much better than the other long process and it frees up the farmer’s time to attend to more important matters.

I hope the agricultural community will take my suggestion into consideration and possibly reform the chicken industry both for their sake and ours.

Italian Pizza

            Originally, pizza was normally sized with typical proportions of cheese and tomatoes and it was not heaped with mountains of toppings. But then the Americans changed it. Now, the Domino's online order comes with an option for extra cheese as if the entire supply of Wisconsin is not enough. In fact, every single topping comes with an option for extra because what we have is never enough.

Italy

America

            At the end of the Domino’s pizza order you can pick your sides and your drink. Instead of going with just water or maybe even some juice, most people will go for the giant 2-liter well of their favorite sugary muck. Even better, they will go for the “diet” version because they want to start eating healthy, although that will only give them justification to go for another slice of that oversized pizza. The best part is that Americans will complain about going to their “holy-mouth-man” every year 

while on the drive back they will be shoveling Snicker’s bars down their greedy throats.

            Also, Americans seem to believe that their food is unique, that their culture shines through in their cuisine. However, they are blind to the fact that their food is just an amalgamation of the food of other cultures. When salsa and guacamole are far more popular than their bland counterparts of ketchup and mustard and when most people would rather take a taco over a boring peanut butter and jelly sandwich, Americans need to realize that it is not a terrible thing to embrace other cultures. 

Life of a Lobster

I was just sitting there all alone. All of my other friends had already left, gallivanting off with some guy who did not want me. Then, from across the room a man pointed at me; I was scared, and I felt like an object to him - not something that was alive and breathing. I had heard the stories about what happens when a stranger approaches you, picks you up, and takes you home.  I could hope that maybe he would be a nice guy, but I knew that in the end they all had the same motives. The man came up and paid for me and I was removed from my safe tank and put into a small bag. I resigned myself to the fact that this man did not care about where I came from or even what my name was (it’s Larry by the way).

            I could hear laughter and there was a sense of impending doom that came over me as I realized it was close to the end. As they set me down, I heard a bubbling noise and when I looked down I saw boiling water. In that instant, I knew that I had come to death’s door. In that instant, I thought about how my whole life I was kept for show and how I had never experienced true freedom. In that instant, I knew that the humans did not care for my pain; they only cared about their "pleasure." In that instant, I realized the worst of humanity was out to get me. Their guiltless greed and lack of compassion towards me is what ended my short life. In the future, I hope that my people will not just be seen as pieces of meat ready for eating, but rather animals with real thoughts and feelings. 

French Toast

There is a secret you were never told. It affects your daily life, yet you have no idea about it.

A lot of the food you eat is disabled.

How does that make you feel? Does your food taste any worse? Are you going to stop eating?

No, because regardless of its shape or size, the food still tastes the same to you.

In the French toast community, we are aware that at any moment we may be changed permanently with one misstep of a fork. Despite this loss of our perfect shape, we remain secure in the knowledge that we will still be enjoyed by some hungry person. So, if our change in shape does not matter to the consumer, why would we care? As long as we accomplish the purpose we were born to do, we are perfectly okay.

However in the human world, someone having a disability is a big deal because society makes them feel as if they can no longer accomplish anything just because of their circumstances. An easy counterexample to this is Stephen Hawking; he is one of the greatest minds of our time even though he has lived with ALS for the majority of his life. This is not to say that all disabled people can accomplish as much as Stephen Hawking, but they still need to be told that they can. If we start treating disability as “normal,” then the disabled will not feel burdened and they will be able to live their life to the fullest. They still have the same talents and they should still have the same opportunity to contribute to society.

Bread

Bread is one of the most basic foods we eat and is a  symbol of many different ideas.  

When Asagi christens Beneatha as "Alaiyo" or "one for whom bread – food – is not enough", it is truly an apt description of her character. Bread used to be the staple food in the diets of ancient civilizations and because of this bread can be interpreted as a symbol of substance or life. So, Asagi essentially describes Beneatha as someone for whom life by itself is not satisfying enough. This is true because she is always questioning her surroundings, and she constantly changes from hobby to hobby such as horseback riding, acting lessons, and guitar lessons. This shows Asagi's high opinion of her because he believes that she is an intellectual person just like him and this is why he is attracted to her. Her journey of fulfillment and self-expression is mocked by others in the family, but she still wants to broaden her mind.  

In the Bible, bread is also used to symbolize a financial investment. This correlates to Walter because he wants to invest in a liquor store that he believes will bring money to the family. The other side of Beneatha's nickname is that it also applies to Walter because he is also not satisfied by his life and he wants to be more successful. For both of them, their bread is their way of life or the ghetto. Since they are both not satisfied with this, they want to use the check to escape their current lives and to explore the world further. Thus, the nickname given by Asagi shows how Walter and Beneath are simply two sides of the same coin.  

Eggs

I come in many different shapes and sizes: hard-boiled, sunny side up, scrambled, and poached are just a few.  

Although I am just a food, I am a symbol of  new life and the cyclic nature of humanity. I am also a symbol of fertility as people used to eat me to ensure that they would be blessed with children. To many, I have a religious significance because I am painted during Easter in order to symbolize the emergence of Jesus. My yolk represents inner beauty and the light people contain on the inside.  

When Ruth tells Walter to "eat his eggs", he gets upset because he believes that she is preventing him from accomplishing his dreams. This is very ironic because Walter is preventing Beneatha from accomplishing her dreams of becoming  doctor by taking the check. Not only does he do this, but also he implies her dream is not achievable because she is a woman by saying "ain't many girls who decide to be a doctor." Since the eggs symbolize new life and doctors are the protectors of life, he hates to see his American Dream deferred in favor of Beneatha's.  He is against eating the eggs because it means that he would  have to accept the way his life is and that he wouldn't be able to change it. Also, gender roles are enforced because Ruth is the one who is cooking while Walter laments his situation. Since eggs show female fertility, Ruth is expected to show Walter that she has eggs because women only had worth once they had proved that they could have children. Eventually, this results in Ruth's pregnancy and her desire to have an abortion.  

Pastry Pigs and Turkeys

"On buffet tables, garnished with glistening hors d'oeuvre, spiced baked hams crowded against salads of harlequin designs and pastry pigs and turkeys bewitched to a dark gold" (Fitzgerald 40). 

In Gatsby's parties his wealth is always ostentatiously displayed, and this instance is no exception. Hors d'oeuvre are typically served for very rich people, and in Gatsby's parties they are also glistening.

Also, the hams are crowded which shows Gatsby's tendency to always strive for the maximum quantity and not settle. The fact that the salads have a harlequin design shows how the salads are more for show than they are for actual eating; thus, Fitzgerald reveals how one of the central ideas of the 1920's was style over substance. Additionally, the turkeys were bewitched to a dark gold which creates an image of the turkeys having a spell cast upon them by a witch who turned them gold. It almost elevates the status of the turkey just because it has reached this magnificent gold color. The word bewitched suggests that the turkeys reached that color unnaturally, which is similar to the illegal way in which Gatsby came into his fortune.

This sentence is a hyperbole because no one actually has this kind of opulence at parties, and Fitzgerald is mocking Americans for believing that wealth will solve their problems. Despite this being a hyperbole, people completely ignore Fitzgerald's mocking tone and attempt to live the lavish lifestyle of Gatsby by throwing Gatsby-themed parties because they are so obsessed with the lifestyle of the twenties. This ignorance shows humanity's propensity to emulate the rich despite Fitzgerald trying to show us the superficiality of Gatsby's life.